In an astonishing display of unparalleled excellence, UPS has once again outdone themselves in the art of vanishing packages and laughable service. Bravo! It's as if they've mastered a form of magical logistics, where packages bound for Dublin embark on an epic journey to the realm of the lost and forgotten. My own package, destined to grace my doorstep two weeks before Christmas, embarked on such an adventure. Did it arrive? Oh, what a quaint notion! Instead, it partook in the grand UPS tradition of playing hide and seek at their Dublin facility. But fear not, for UPS, in their boundless generosity, graced me with a sequel - and a replacement package from my shipper was on the way! Promised for a Monday delivery, it too decided to join the mystical dance of the missing parcels. The UPS tracker, a beacon of hope, teased me with promises of a delivery between the hours of 1300 and 1500. I waited, anticipation turning to despair, as the realisation dawned that my package had likely transcended the physical plane. Seeking solace, I called their customer support, a merry band of storytellers who spun tales of depots locked tighter than Fort Knox, and updates that were more elusive than a unicorn. Promises of callbacks turned out to be as substantial as a puff of smoke, and the disconnect button must surely be the most worn-out part of their phone system. It's a marvel, truly, how UPS has taken the simple concept of package delivery and turned it into a labyrinthine epic of mystery and intrigue. With an impressive online 1.2 ish -star rating, they stand as a beacon of hope for aspiring businesses everywhere. Why, I'm inspired to start my own delivery service, where I too can achieve greatness by simply making packages disappear. I'm aiming high – perhaps a 1.2-star rating is within reach too!