Ah, Lycamobile, where do I begin with this beacon of excellence in the realm of scamming? If you're looking for an unparalleled experience in being swindled, look no further. Lycamobile sets the gold standard in deception and customer neglect. First, let's talk about their cellular coverage. It's a masterpiece in uselessness. Want to make a call? Good luck finding a signal. Need to send a text? Better hope you're not in a building, or near a tree, or breathing. It's almost as if they've strategically placed their cell towers in the most inconvenient locations imaginable. Bravo, Lycamobile, for achieving the impossible: a mobile network that barely works! Customer service? Oh, it's a gem. Their representatives must be specially trained in the art of ignoring customers. Emails go unanswered, unread, and probably straight to the trash. It's almost poetic how efficiently they can pretend you don't exist. And if by some miracle you do get a response, expect it to be as useful as a chocolate teapot. Their ability to provide non-answers and empty promises is truly second to none. Now, let’s talk about their commitment to theft. It's rare to find a company that can take your money with such blatant disregard for legality. Unauthorized debit orders? Check. Impossible-to-cancel contracts? Double check. They’ve turned the simple act of cancelling a service into an epic quest, complete with the dramatic climax of cancelling your credit card just to escape their clutches. It's almost admirable how dedicated they are to keeping your money. In summary, if you’re in the market for a company that excels at providing non-existent cellular coverage, horrific customer service, and a first-class ticket to Scamville, Lycamobile is your perfect match. They truly are the Michelangelo of mobile scams. Bravo, Lycamobile, for setting new heights in the art of ripping off your customers!